Lessons in Caring, Part Three: Compassion & Understanding

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I've written twice before about Lessons in Caring and all of these articles are about different aspects of building character. Character is a top priority for me in rearing my children. I believe that there is no way to build a strong character without teaching them to focus on and consider other people, but also to teach them to care deeply about what they know about themselves - NOT about what others think about them. I want to teach them to treat others how they should, but to value their own self-esteem over the typical negative self-thought that society tries to impose on them. It seems there is little to no compassion or understanding in the world anymore. Bullying is out of control. No one seems to be … [Read more...]

“What I Love About My Husband” – Week 129: I Never Have to Ask Him to Change

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This morning was quite emotional. I woke up to messages from two friends and a family member basically asking me if my husband was still alive. This is the second time this has happened since he started working offshore five years ago. Immediately I started Googling to find out anything I could about the explosion that happened on an oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico and thankfully found that it was a platform owned by a corporation out of Mexico. My relief turned to fear, panic, and anxiety as I realized that this could have been a tragedy for my family. It turned to empathy and grief as I realized that it was a tragedy for 20 families just like mine - families who send their sons, husbands, cousins, uncles, brothers, … [Read more...]

Me

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I may not have myself completely figured out but the one thing I know that has never changed is that I am unapologetically ME, whatever "me" means. I am not malicious. I don't hurt anybody. I do all I can to maintain peace and just be happy. My overwhelming need to be understood usually works against me because most people don't. We're all alone in our minds - no one meets us there. We're alone in our thoughts, alone in our feelings. We all need a peaceful place. We all need the chance to just be ... human. Sounds simple. Until you realize that everyone else has standards set for you. Expectations. And so you become conditioned. I made many questionable decisions in my life early-on and as a result I … [Read more...]

“What I Love About My Husband” – Week 118: His is NOT a Comfort Zone Kind of Love

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It's been 29 weeks since my last "What I Love About My Husband" post... and perhaps that says something. Life often gets so chaotic, so hectic that even though you maintain a relationship - a bond - even the most well-intentioned couples can easily find themselves feeling somewhat detached. Unmoved. My husband worked his ass off last year. Out of 12 months, there was only ONE offshore hitch that he didn't work an extra week, which was during football season (he's a coach) and it didn't lend itself to much free time for us to really connect. With so much responsibility on both of our shoulders, we found ourselves communicating less and most of our "talk time" was more idle chit chat, filling the minutes with … [Read more...]

31 Things I’ve Learned This Year

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At the moment, I'm 31 years old. As most of you are aware, the last couple of years have been a little trying for me. I've struggled with who I am. I've doubted myself. I've wondered if I actually have a place to belong, a purpose to operate within the confines of, and ultimately whether anything I'm doing is actually contributory to those around me -- or whether anything I'm involved in is actually worthwhile. I've had a couple of meltdowns. At this point, I don't have any answers to any of the questions I started asking myself when I turned 30. Friday, I will celebrate 32 years in this ever-evolving (and always confusing) world... and although I admittedly don't have all (or even most) of the answers I'm … [Read more...]

I’m Drowning

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I'm drowning and the lifeguard doesn't even see me. Someone send help... Sigh. Life... Life is just an ambiguous collection of truths that mean something different to each individual experiencing it. There's no standard of measure. There's no qualifying factor. You're given a life composed of uncontrollable circumstances, told the stakes are equal when the chips are really stacked against us all, and sent out to make your life mean something. But riddle me this... how the hell are you supposed to decide exactly what meaning your life should have? What happens - do you just fall into the first sinkhole you come to and claim that existence? Do you accept what's assigned to you? People say to make your own … [Read more...]

I’m Spent… but I’m Figuring “Me” Out

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The simplest things make me reflect on life on a grand scale and I end up getting so deep into one thought that it takes on a life all itself. The last couple of years have been mostly about finding myself. Who is Kat? What does she like? What does she want? What defines her OUTSIDE of all the roles and characters she plays to everyone who needs her to be something to them? What is Kat about when she's not mothering? What is Kat about when she's not businessing? What is Kat about when she's not wife-ing? What is Kat about all on her own without anyone else's presuppositions, past memories, expectations, needs, and influences? The fact is, my whole life I've tried proving that becoming a teen mother … [Read more...]

iBandz Wristbands Review #ibandzwristbandsrock @iBandzRock #ad

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As mostly everyone knows, I run two boot camp classes locally and on online class. My clients vary in age, location, body composition, fitness level, and gender but they all have one thing in common: THEY HAVE GOALS! They started one of my classes for a reason. They were looking to change something, gain something, lose something, find something, accomplish something, achieve something -- BE something more, something different than they were before. When I was contacted about reviewing the iBands Wristbands, I was ecstatic and knew EXACTLY what I wanted to appear on them. GOALS! iBandz sent me three wristbands -- one for myself and two to give away to my clients. I love the band. It's durable, it's noticeable … [Read more...]

“What I Love About My Husband” – Week 89

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This video on Facebook really hit me this morning. I remember asking myself COUNTLESS times over the years why my daddy didn't want me, didn't call me, didn't care about me. I'm 31 years old and Father's Day still hard for me. I try not to be bitter or to resent him, but it's not easy. Emotions are hard to control... Post by Uncle Reece. This is why I adore my husband. There are too many children and adults in the world who can relate to this, including me. I'm so grateful that NONE of my husband's kids will ever know what this feels like because no matter what happens he is selfless and does his best for them. As parents, in all honesty we aren't always truly interested in what our kids are into, … [Read more...]

Monifah Carter is Gay and Married. Get Over It!

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It's crazy to me how much people judge. I saw some of the comments on a photo of Monifah Carter's wedding. For those who are unaware of who she is, she is gay. Among the MANY comments on the photo was one that said, "God don't bless mess!" ... I'd like to know what God she serves because I don't know anyone in this world who isn't a mess yet so many of us are blessed beyond our understanding. I've been one hell of a mess in my life and He's ALWAYS managed to bless me. I'm not saying that I approve or don't approve of gay marriage -- I'm saying that I'm not gay so I feel like that's not my place to judge someone or assume that I know what God is thinking about them based on something that has little priority to me … [Read more...]