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7 responses

  1. Kadi
    February 16, 2014

    Oh no. I’m so sorry, Kat. We are called to love, even when our heart is tired of being broken, but I completely understand why you are tired of trying. I felt like you do for a long time. Finally, I had to change my heart and stop expecting my dad to be what I wanted/needed him to be and just love him as he was. When I did that and started telling him what a good dad he is and that I love him, something
    Changed in him. He started trying again. Really
    Trying to be the dad he hadn’t been.
    I’m praying for you, friend. Xoxo

    • Kat Robertson
      February 16, 2014

      It’s really hard … I appreciate your comment, Kadi. I think it might be different if he would ever just acknowledge that he wasn’t there. That he didn’t try. That he wasn’t involved. He seems to think he was and it’s hurtful. If he would ever just express that he had ANY regrets about how he was (or rather, wasn’t) as a father to me, it might be easier for me to move forward and let it go, but not having that is hard. It’s like, I’ve suffered for all of this time and I’m supposed to just let him go on and think that he’s been great? I know life isn’t fair, but that just seems wrong.

  2. Rajean Blomquist
    February 16, 2014

    I think the term ‘there is no true textbook on how to be a parent’ is more than just a passing phrase. Honestly, some are gifted, some work hard at it, some are guessing all the way, some are failures, some never try, some learn as they go, others had great examples to live by, still others had horrible examples who may have made them do everything in their power to be the parent they never had. there are so many who fall somewhere in between. Maybe this is your time with your dad? Not so much to make amends for all that is lacking in your past, but for beginning the kind of relationship you’ve desired, deserved. Maybe not. I say go into your visit with an open mind and heart and know that no matter what, you are blessed with a loving husband, children, family, and friends.

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