I’ve talked about my dad a few times over the years, here and there. I don’t often. The confusion and anger never seem to fade, so hiding them away has become easier for me. Every time I think about him, I think of my husband — how amazing he is with his children… and I’m so thankful that I can rest assured that even if he picked up and walked away from me in the next moment, my children would never feel the pain I’ve known my whole life. Barry would never give up on being their father. He loves all SEVEN of his children — the five that are mine, and the two that I love like my own.
It isn’t right for kids to be made to feel guilty for loving their father. It’s not right for a mom to tell children their dad has no authority over them. It’s not right for a good father to be denied his rights simply because he happens to not be with his child(ren)’s mother. STOP IT, ladies. You’re not making anything better for anyone by acting this way. Move on, and start things over the right way tomorrow. It’s never too late for change! NO child should be made to choose a side between his/her parents. They cannot thrive with that type of confusion.
I got a little more emotional in this video than I anticipated… could be just me already feeling wacky from being riddled with the flu all week, but I’m still deeply affected by my lack of relationship with my dad, and I wish more parents would consider their children rather than doing what is easy for them — or working to get back at the other parent through the kids.
I am participating in March Vlogging Madness, hosted by PennyPinchingDiva.com! I will be posting a vlog on my YouTube channel every day during the month of March! :) Follow the hashtag #MarchVloggingMadness on Twitter and look up the tag on YouTube!
I just watched your video and i want to thank you , going through a divorce and wanting noting more then to fix my marriage I see myself having so much anger that I did start to think F you . These are my kids , blah blah blah! Now I know I can’t put my kids in the middle .
Amen! Amen! Amen! I agree with you 110% on this. I felt SO bad while watching this video for you, and for the sons that Barry are not able to raise like they need to be raised. (If that is too much for this comment, please edit it). I have seen firsthand how boys grow up to be “men” and hate their mother with a passion. I wish I could hug you because the pain is SO evident in your eyes. Look at how old you are and how much of an affect that your father’s past actions has on you. I’m SO sorry. And I’m SO sorry that I am at a lost for words. It just disgusts me what he has done to you, and that there are SO many men out there that have a second family, and they’ll be that great father the second time around while not even looking back at the family that they left behind.
Take care & I love you lots,
Shynea
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I agree with you Kat, that alot of women do this. But what about if the father is a bad infleunce around the kids? In my situation, my kids father lives in another state and he rarely calls. When he do call he is promising my kids things and lying to them. Telling them he is coming down to visit and going to send them presents and when he dosen’t do any of that, Its my kids who are crying themselves to sleep because daddy didn’t do what he says he was. My daughter still asks did he send money for her new toys, and he promised that a year ago. Im left to pick up the pieces and go out and buy whatever he promised. When he calls the first I tell him is he better not tell the kids any lies because he will get the dial tone. Im a product of my father doing the exact some things to me and it affects a child greatly. Im working through issues because my father wasn’t around, I remember holding on to his lies about doing things for me. I will not allow my babies to go through these issues which can be prevented to some degree.
HELLO KAT… YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THIS VIDEO HAS DONE AND WILL DO FOR ME…
YOUR MESSAGE HITS MY HEART LIKE A BULLET. I CAN NOT TELL YOU HOW MUCH THIS VIDEO MEANS TO ME. MY DAUGHTER’S MOM AND I ARE IN A BATTLE VIA THE COURTS OVER MY DAUGHTER, AND HER REASONS FOR KEEPING ME FROM MY CHILD SEEMED SO JUSTIFIED AND REAL UNTIL RECENTLY WHEN SOME THINGS WERE BROUGHT UP IN MEDIATION. THIS VIDEO COULD SAVE MY PATERNAL RELATIONSHIP WITH MY DAUGHTER AND COULD SAVE MY DAUGHTER FROM GROWING UP DISTANTLY AND ESTRANGED FROM ME (HER FATHER)…. IF YOU COULD PLEASE E-MAIL ME WHEN YOU SEE THIS POST I WOULD REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE TO TALK TO YOU. IF YOU COULD EVEN SEND ME THIS VIDEO SO THAT I COULD PLAY IT FOR THE JURY WHEN I GO TO COURT TO GET RIGHTS TO HAVE MY THREE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER IN MY LIFE, THEN YOU WOULD PROBABLY SAVE MY DAUGHTER AND MYSELF FROM HAVING TO GO THROUGH LIFE WITHOUT EACH OTHER. PLEASE E-MAIL ME WHEN YOU SEE THIS SO THAT I CAN TALK TO YOU FURTHER. GOD BLESS YOU FOR WHAT YOU’VE SAID AND HOW MUCH THIS IS TRULY HELPING ME AND MANY OTHER PEOPLE. YOU MAY HAVE SAVED ME AND SAVED MY DAUGHTER BY POSTING THIS. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RESPOND… MY EMAIL IS MMULLENS1213@GMAIL.COM… MY PHONE NUMBER IS 6142093231… I WOULD APPRECIATE AN EMAIL OR A PHONE CALL. YOU ARE A SAVIOR FOR THIS. I THANK YOU AND WITH YOUR HELP, MY DAUGHTER WILL BE THANKING YOU HERE IN TEN TO TWENTY YEARS FOR WHAT YOUR EMOTIONS AND PASSIONATE WORDS HAVE DONE FOR US….
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU MA’AM.
-MATT MULLENS