How confusing can things get?

Barry and I have had a rocky few days… just found out he is going to be a father again. He wasn’t exactly ‘being still’ while we weren’t together this summer. Kara called me on Barry’s cell phone when I had it to let me know to tell him that she is about 4 months pregnant again. It’s something we have SLOWLY decided to work through (due to me freaking out and him groveling, but hey who’s keeping score?)… I decided to get back with him knowing that he’d been staying with her… and he decided to get back with me knowing I had been dating… and I can’t exactly be upset about what was going on when we were split up (even if I managed to not “do” anything while we were split up, but again… who’s keeping score?). It’s hard to swallow but we’ve been spending more time together- just laughing and having fun together… it’s wonderful to FEEL the love between us… and then up pops this and it’s like last year all over again… I just can’t let all of this go… there’s nothing greater than the feeling of family to me. I never had that feeling… my father was never there, and I don’t want that for Maya! I have this burning question in my mind if I’m making a huge mistake though. I mean, really, is this going to be an annual thing for him? Maybe I’m an idiot. I don’t know. Time will tell… we’ll see how it works out. Kara told me she knows I’ll be stupid and stay with him anyway. Um… call me crazy, I’m sure a lot of people would handle this differently, but of the two of US, I’m the stupid one? Funny.